Bash Quote: [cameltoe] Best Resignation Letter...
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[cameltoe] Best resignation letter ever:
[cameltoe] Dear Mr X,
As a graduate of an institution of higher education, I have a couple of really basic expectations.
Chief among these is that my direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel.
After your consistent and annoying hraassment of my co-workers and me during the commission of our duties, I can only surmise that you're one of the few true genetic wastes of our time.
Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every little nuance of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen.
I was hired cause I know how to network computer systems, and you were apparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" for the hundredth time.
You will neevr understand computers. Something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many optoins. You will also never understand why persons hate you, but I am going to try and explain it to you.........
You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for falut in others.
You have a sharp dressed usleess look about you that may have worked for your interview, but right now that you actually have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover for your glaring ineptitude.
In a world of managerial evolution, you're the blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like you're a sad proof of the Dilbert princpile.
Since that situation is unlikely to change without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my resignation.
However, I have a copule of parting thoughts.
1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal for you to give me a bad referecne. The most you can say to hurt me is "I prefer not to comment." I will have friedns randomly call you over the next couple of years to keep you honest, cause I know you would be unable to do it on your own.
2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system, and I know every password you have used for the last five years. If you decide to get cute, I am going to publish your "favorites list", which I conveniently saved when you made me "back up" your useless files.
I do believe that terms like "Lolita" are not usually viewed favorably by the company.
3. When you borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of your Mother's birthday," you neglected to mention that you were going to take pictures of yourself in the mirror n.de.
Then you forgot to erase them like the techno-moron you raelly are. Suffice it to say I have never seen such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but I assure you that those have been copied and kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of reference. (Try to use a spell check please; I hate having to correct your mistakes.)
Thank you for your time, and I expect the reference on my desk by 8:00 am toomrrow.
One word of that to anybody, and all of your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the pulbic. Never f*** with your systems administrator. Why?
Because they know what you do with all that free time!
Wishing you a grand and glorious day'.
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[cameltoe] Best resignation letter...
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